LONG TIME NO SEE :P
Well this seems to be the perfect line to start this post.
Frankly speaking these days my mind has been completely rusted.
I don’t read & I don’t write. My other blog has been one year old & it has only one post,,my ranking is dropping,,,no increase in followers,,,in short I’ve screwed blogging a big time.
Nevertheless,,,its better to be late than to be never (something like that,,,I’m not sure about the exact wordings)
So now when I’ve given enough of explanations,,let me start now.
The time when I was not here,, I was in Delhi and then in Allahabad,,,, chasing my dream.
Months before when I had decided what I actually want (I’ve decided), I was not sure that if I’ll actually work hard for that, but someone has rightly said dreams are something that won’t let you sleep.
Okay it’s not the correct format to write about my dream,,,so let me be a little systematic.
22 May to 1 June, 2010
My first attempt to join army,,, my first SSB,,Allahabad
I had appeared in an interview for army & luckily I had cleared it & I received call letter for SSB interview. Since I had this thing to join defense and of course after a friend insisted me,,,I decided to go for it. I went to Allahabad with my parents,,,it was my first trip outside Jammu without friends so my parents insisted accompanying me,,,though I didn’t like the idea but I had to agree. I made very good friends there,,,,was an awesome experience but I wasn’t recommended. This SSB made me even more determined to join army & that was when I decided what I wanted to be.
27 September to 29 September, 2010
My first ever trip for job. It was a campus drive in Rayat College, Ropar, Punjab
I had this phobia for written exams,,I always thought that I won’t be able to clear any written exam so I never tried much but this time I wanted to give it a try as I had heard that IBM’s written is the easiest. Four of us decided to go,,,we prepared & we went. Luckily, all of us cleared first two rounds & we entered third but unfortunately 3 of us couldn’t get through it,,,good thing was that my best friend cleared it & presently she’s working with IBM, Noida and my phobia for written exams faded as here I cleared the written.
7 October to 10 October, 2010
My second trip for job, a multi-industry fair, Laxmidevi College, Alwar, Rajasthan
The remaining three people from Ropar trip went here. In advertisement there were so many companies but we were eligible for only one company & that was IBM again. All of us cleared three rounds & reached the final round. Everything went well but result was never out. Anyways, now we were prepared for more hardships to come.
22 October to 31 October, 2010
My third trip for job, G.B. Pant College, Greater Noida, TCS written exam.
This time in train we were only two people, of course both from Ropar trip, we guys really stick together till end. My friend was going for different company but I had one more friend, another best friend. Though I didn't want to appear for this exam as I had airforce exam the next day and I still had little phobia of written exam but a friend of mine who was already placed in the same company insisted a lot & I decided to give it a try. I appeared in exam on 23rd, my friend appeared few hours before me, her result was announced & she was called for interview next day. I attempted two questions less than her so I had this little hope but we were told that our result will be mailed to us. My friend cleared interview & received the offer letter too. I kept waiting for one week but nothing so I came back home,,thinking that I screwed this one too. But a surprise was waiting for me, one day after I reached home, I received a mail, selection mail actually but interview date was not mentioned,, more waiting for me .
24 November to 28 November, 2010
My fourth trip, TCS office gurgaon, TCS interview.
I waited a lot but no mail from TCS,,,again my friend who insisted for TCS written suggested to mail TCS ,,,I did so and the same day I received call for interview. This time I was all alone, my first birthday in train,,and I was all alone, no one around till few hours.
Birthday was fantastic, so many surprises waiting for me, had so much fun, gave interview, which went good & came back.
2 December, 2010
Received my call letter for SSB interview which was again in Allahabad & same day received mail from TCS. I had been selected for TCS. So I had the backup job & now I had to chase my dream,, my longest trip was about to start,,,most tough & most memorable trip ever……
18 December, 2010 to 16 January, 2011
My longest trip outside home not for any job search but for my dream,,,,the dream that didn’t let me sleep for 6 months.
Ever since I filled the form for Technical Entry in army in July, 2010, I was waiting for the SSB call letter and now that I had received it,, all I had to do was to follow my dream.
The two weeks for which I had to stay in Delhi, were the most difficult days of my life. Firstly because I hadn’t ever stayed for that long away from home & secondly,,,,ok ,,,,that I don’t want to mention,,,and thirdly,, it was really tiring,,waking up 6 in morning & sleeping 1 in night.
I was missing my mom like anything,,,best thing about mothers is that they know what you are going through yet they never show this. My mom used to call me twice or thrice a day,,,and every time she asked me if I was eating well,,,mothers are mothers afterall,,,concerned about you all the time. And every time I made a chapatti & left without having breakfast,,,,I wished my mom to be with me and of course on several other occasions also. The worst thing about me is that I don’t open up that easily,,,,not with everyone,,,it takes lot of time for me to share what I’m actually feeling and there are only two or three people with whom I can share anything & whom I know have the power to cheer me up,,,,and unfortunately there I had no one among these two or three people but thank god someone invented mobile phones,,,everytime the dam of my tears was about to break,,,I could hold up myself & make a call to those special people & everything was fine after that. Though at one occasion that dam actually broke in spite of my efforts. Difficult times teach you some important lessons of life,,,,and I realized how much I love my family & friends especially my sisters,,,, because I never felt like I’ll miss them so much,,,their silly pranks,,,stupid things,,,weird habits & numerous fights that I had with them. This phase was quite torturing,,,,mentally,,,emotionally & physically but thank God it ended soon
Now the real adventure started. The first day of new year & I was again in a train,,,train to the most memorable & most beautiful journey of my life.
I reached Allahabad on 2nd January, 2011. As I was walking to the MCO,,a flash back was floating before my eyes,,,,my mom & dad with me,,anxious,,,excited,,,nervous,,,walking with me but this time I was alone,,,,feeling nothing at all,,,,totally numb. I reached MCO saw few girls waiting there,,,hi hello & my expedition started. Luckily I spotted my friend from last SSB,,,can’t explain how great it feels when you are among strangers & all of a sudden you find someone you already know. The four days just evaporated instantly,,,,again I made so many good friends & ofcourse I got so many compliments that how sweet & cute I am :P
All the tests were done so now all we had to do was to pray only. I,,my friend from last SSB & one more friend were together,,,,totally blank,,,,didn’t know what to say what to talk about,,,so much was going in our minds,,,that thing was very important for us. It is a strange thing with humans when something really important is coming towards them,,,a thing that can actually change their lives,,,they just start remembering all the crest falls in their lives,,,,obviously because of the reason that in case this thing also turns out to be a crest fall,,,they could just hold up themselves. We too started discussing our lives,,,what all we have faced in our lives till now & what will happen if not this?
The discussion ended & we were numb,,,silent,,,,blankly starting the place where we were living. All of a sudden,,,I remembered the conference day of my first SSB(previous one) when I called my mom to tell that I wasn’t recommended and then the faces of my parents started floating in front of my eyes,,,the sadness in their eyes,,,and of course the dead expectations on their faces. Till now I had prepared myself for the worst but as soon as I remembered this,,,I broke into tears,,,,it was the second time in this long trip when I wept. But soon I calmed down & stopped thinking about it,,,I was ready to accept whatever was there was me.
7 January 2011,,,,Fifth day of SSB,,the conference
I was the first one to face conference being Chest No. 1,,,,my conference took hardly 15 seconds or so. The conference of others was going on but I was sure that I won’t be recommended,,,I went back to lines,,,took my cell & called my friend,,,told her what all I was feeling. My friends are my greatest assets,,,just 10 minutes of call & I felt better,,,went back to the place where results were to be announced.
A army officer walked into the room with a file containing the fate of 24 girls sitting in the room. He started giving the speech,,,,and I wasn;t listening to it. My mind was reminding me the mistakes that I made in the past four days,,,and with each mistake that I was reminded of,,,I was sure of not getting through this SSB,,so I started preparing myself for taking up job in TCS. I started thinking that how I’m going to tell my parents about this & of course how I’ll handle myself. Suddenly I become attentive when the officer said, “The selected candidates are….” And my heart beat stopped,,,I knew that the result will go like this “selected candidates are chest number 2,3 ,….(anyone till chest number 24 but not me). I was holding back my tears,,the officer continued, “ok the selected candidates have to spell out their names & roll numbers. So the selected candidates are Chest no. 1” and I was blank,,,I was not sure if what I heard was correct. The officer turned his eyes towards me and I was supposed to spell out my name & roll number and I couldn’t spell my name,,,,I forgot my roll number too but after few seconds I gained my senses and as soon as I was finished tears started rolling down my cheeks. The officer was finished with the results & to be very honest I wasn’t listening to the results. People were hugging me,, congratulating me but I was numb. We were given the new chest numbers,,,the white ones,,with red plus sign & I was number 1 again.
I called my mom & then I called my friend,,,I just said hello,,,I was actually weeping that time & she replied, “congratulations” and I was astonished how she got to know??? With my trembling voice it was not obvious that I was in but she somehow guessed that,,,divine bond,,,,soul connection I guess.My cell started flooding with calls & I started calling everyone.
Then I called my dad,,told him that I’m recommended & the reply I got made that day the happiest day of my life,,,he said, “congratulations” and before he ended the call I heard him telling someone “kudi select ho gyi hai ji” (girl is selected) and I could easily guess from his voice how happy he was. This was the first time he congratulated me for something,,though I actually wanted to hear “I’m proud of you” nevertheless I was happy and I hope he will say these words when he will put two stars on my shoulders,,,fingers crossed for that.
Then our medical examination started and I was medically fit,,,came back home and I was given such a warm welcome. Everyone in my family,,,bade papa,,,badi mummy,,,chachi,,,chachu,,,granny,,,sisters,,,cousins and of course my parents congratulated me and many of them said that I’ve made them proud. Chachu said that I’ve proved that I’m the son of my parents,,,bade papa said that now they can tell others that we too have a captain in our family. Mom was super happy,,,hugging and kissing me all the time,,, I was hoping to get some such thing from dad but hard luck there.
I was asked to tell in detail about my ssb and the whole day I kept repeating the same thing. My family was super happy for me,,,this made me even happier,,,I wasn’t expecting so much.
Later on in evening my younger cousin came to me & she said, “di, you know the day you were selected your dad was so happy,,he was telling us that you have made him proud and now he could tell others that his daughter is a captain in army”
That was it,,,,I was the happiest person in the world then.
Though the merit list is pending & I’m not sure if I’ll be an army officer but for sure these moments will remain the happiest moments of my life.