Wednesday, March 3, 2010

RESTLESS!!!!

Finally I’m here,,,,,,,after loads of arguments with myself. Still I’m not sure if I should be here or not. I mean I’m still restless & I know scribbling anything here now would mean nothing. No one will understand. But then,,,,,,,,since when I started caring about what others think????

Anyways I’m here with my restless mind & its restless thoughts. It has been a month since I’m quite disturbed,,,,,,,,,,why,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,I don’t know????

I haven’t shared this with anyone ,,,just because I know that my mind works on a different frequency & it has never been easy for me to explain things to others. Moreover, since I don’t know the exact reason so it’s better to keep this restless to me rather than to transfer it to others.

I tried hell lot of ways to get this out of me,,,,but nothing works.

I also deleted my accounts from all social networking sites.

I don’t even now find peace in novels. I try to read but I can’t.

I haven’t written a post for my blog for past two weeks.

No orkut,,no facebook,,,no novels,,,no blogging,,,,,these were like drugs to me but I’m living without them. Something is wrong I know but can’t figure it out.

Out of so many ways I’ve tried,,the only one that gives me peace is to be alone. I like remaining alone at home,,,answering calls & sending messages is ok but facing people is something I don’t like. Because somewhere my restlessness shows up then & since I don’t know the reason behind that so I prefer to be alone.

The reason can’t be college as I’m like this before the starting of college,,,,not friends actually,,,then what???? I don’t know. At times I feel like crying my heart out,,,,but it is stupid as I don’t have any reason. I see people around who have their sad love stories,,,bf/gf problem,,,friends problem,,,future problem,,,,,and I find them lucky,,,,they at least know what solution they are seeking & here am I,,,,without any definite problem & hence without any definite solution.

10 comments:

art2eye.co.cc said...

Hat's off..!!

Some people don't even have confidence to speak out loud what they feel. You have got it in you.

Sometime back even I did the same, deleted most of my social networking accounts, or atleast deacivated them for public search or viewing. (Reason I don't know, I just wanted to erase my online identity, I guess). This restlessness without the f**king reasons is what sucks most...So even these days I just visit my blogrolls and read blogs of you people and don't write coz I think I have lost the enthusiasm of a kid/youth. I read whatever you guys write to atleast feel that once upon a time I was also full of life like you. But well, this is just a phase of life, it will pass in some time and you will get the light.

So cheer up and flow with the wind...

art2eye.co.cc said...

I posted a comment, but I guess it just got lost in the restlessness of the clouds...
Now I can't write that again...so will just say....some people don't even have confidence to speak their heart and mind out. You have got it in you ... cheer up - smile and flow with the wind... bina-faltu ki tension kyo lena bachhe... :D

sepo said...

??!!
whts up dude ?
the answer is smwhere deep inside u seems like the thing thats bugging u..u dun want to admit it to urself too..!
once u do that u ll feel better trust me...! and the staying underground wala idea is also not that bad :P

vandy said...

@MS
i too hope it pass with time

@ sepo

yeah that really works

Dhruv.. said...

Don't you worry... help is just around the corner. Whatever it is..it will pass away !

vandy said...

@dhruv

hope so

vivek said...

bad bad! running away from problems aint gonna help. . .n most of the times, the hitch is too trivial to be payed heed upon. Your just being paranoid about a silly problem that might have crept in!

It's important to treasure every moment of your life, before they dwindle into past!

Cheer up asap, else you'll get old suddenly and regret having wept these precious moments! :D

vandy said...

@vivek
i need to think abt wat u suggested.

Sorcerer said...

That was really good writeup.
the key is u opened up about it and i think half of the issue is solved when you speak about it.

:) cheer up

vandy said...

@sorcerer

i'm afraid prblm is still there :(

LinkWithin

Blog Widget by LinkWithin